I am a woman of action. I know there are things to do, and I want to be doing them. My sister Debbie shares this trait. We are “alot” by nature. Debbie’s kids (my adorable niece and nephew) and our sister Marianne, do not share this trait, nor do they understand this. They just watch, waiting and hoping for us to stop. If the busying goes on for too long, Bridget and Brendan will go take a nap. But since Marianne is just visiting, and is trapped, she just looks at us and says “Will you two please sit the f*ck down”. She makes a valid point.
As I have shared with you I am at a huge crossroad in my life. I have discovered my calling and I am being pulled toward it. I even wrote a blog about my 20 seconds of insane courage. I am so excited and ready to step into my second chance. I can’t wait to shake the dust of this old, spirit sucking job and move boldly into the sunshine of doing for a living that which I am so passionate about. So I complete all the action steps I believe necessary to create this space, this life. I spend countless hours creating, writing, discussing, revising, and contacting. I put it all out there, and nothing happens. Huh? What? So I re-evaluate. What did I miss? Who didn’t I contact? What didn’t I do? I must need more action and I go about more creating, more contacting, more steps and more busyness. The dream and vision makes a little progress, and it stalls again. No, no, no. This is not how I envisioned this going down. This is not how it is supposed to be unraveling. This should be happening much quicker, like NOW. This is not the plan! Or is it?
Much of my problem stems from not knowing the difference between what is my plan and what is God’s plan for me. I know I can’t sit on my ass and expect good things to happen, but in all my busyness, am I too busy to hear the actual plan? Am I getting in my own way? Am I getting in the Universe’s way? I wish I knew. I really do. But if I trust in the Divine Plan, and I truly do, why do I question Divine Timing?
In order to better align myself with the Universe’s calling, I have made an addition to my morning ritual. After my prayer on my knees, I stand up and raise my arms, breathe deep and say thank you to God, and humbly ask what is mine to do today?
And now……..I am going to sit the f*ck down, trust and listen. Thank you God (and Marianne ).
In faith and stillness,
PS. In case you are wondering, I did ask Marianne if I could use this story .
It came without ribbons. It came without tags. It came without packages, boxes or bags. And he puzzled and puzzled ’till his puzzler was sore. Then the Grinch thought of something he hadn’t before. What if Christmas, he thought, doesn’t come from a store? What if Christmas, perhaps, means a little bit more?”
― Dr. Seuss, How the Grinch Stole Christmas
I struggle with this time of year. I am a bit of a Grinch, a Scrooge. It’s only because I am confused by the commercialism and the whole idea that we need to go broke in order to celebrate the Christ child. Everyone is said to have the “Christmas Spirit” at this time of year. We are nicer, gentler, and more friendly. Ok. I have seen a lot of people pushing in the street, whacking people with their packages and rushing to get from one place to the next. I watch people hurry from one commitment to another, talking about how they are not sure how they will be able to “fit it all in”. I find myself many times on the outside looking in. But this year I have instituted a few actions to try to get and stay in the Christmas spirit.
- When everyone is rushing and pushing in the streets, I make sure I smile and say hello. I say excuse me, or I hold the door for a stranger. It makes people stop and take a moment, and most of the time they smile back.
- I picked out one person who sent me a Christmas card and gave her a call. Not a Facebook message, not an email, not a text, a phone call. I told her I wanted to hear her voice and wish her a Merry Christmas.
- During my run, I picked out one block and really took in and admired all the Christmas decorations. I didn’t just run by. If someone happened to be outside, I made a point to tell them how much I enjoy their Christmas display.
- I stopped and spoke to the person ringing the bell for the Salvation Army (someone other than my sister ) . I asked how they came to volunteer and I thanked them for their service.
I think the Grinch might be right when he said “….What if perhaps Christmas means a little bit more?”. Christmas means that I get to spend time with my family. Christmas means that I can celebrate my faith because I live in a land of freedom. Christmas means that I can be gentler, kinder and more forgiving. Christmas means a wish for Peace on Earth. Christmas means that I wish good will on all men. Yes, the Grinch was sort of right, Christmas mean A LOT more. Thank you for being part of my Christmas.
God bless us, everyone.