You want me to change WHAT?
change (Photo credit: Sean MacEntee)
Have you ever been at one of those crossroads in life where you know you need to change, but that thought is paralyzing? You ask the Universe why, oh why, now? Haven’t I grown enough? When I was getting sober, clearly change was necessary. So I innocently asked, “you want me to change what?” I was told “EVERYTHING”. I’m sorry, huh?? You want me to change WHAT? EVERYTHING. It seemed impossible. It wasn’t.
I am here again, but this time it is not my drinking, it’s my thinking. I am at that place where I have to change EVERYTHING. If someone told you that you had to change most everything about your thinking, but in exchange, you would find inner peace, would you do it? Would you even be willing to give it a try? My spiritual quest has brought me to this crossroad. I am told that I can have the deep, inner peace I so desperately desire. In exchange, I have to change EVERYTHING. Damn.
The spiritual teachers lay out a very specific path to this sanctuary. You have to see everyone as divine love, one of God’s children, perceive only their good because their bad doesn’t exist. Yep. That means the guy that cut you off and took your parking space. Divine Love. The woman at work who refuses to lift one finger to help you. One of God’s children. The person who left the dog crap on the sidewalk and walks away pretending it wasn’t their dog crap. Only good. So are you ready to change your thinking? Are you ready to change everything? How do you feel about hard work? I mean really hard work.
This is the second time in my life that I am willing to go to any length to get “it”. So, as soon as the human, I am so far from divine it’s actually scary, thought pops into my head, I consciously repeat the changed thought. The thought that will bring me inner peace. The divine truth that everyone and everything is love. Currently about 1 out of every 5 of my thoughts need re-working. So I am spending much of every day changing my thoughts. Am I mentally exhausted? Absolutely! The question comes back to how bad do you want anything?
I was exhausted during my entire first year of sobriety, but I didn’t want to die. I was worn down at the halfway point of my 3 ½ year weight loss journey, but I didn’t want to stop before I was healthy. At mile 9 of the half marathon I was pretty sure I wasn’t going to make it, at mile 12 it was definite, but I didn’t want to give up. I didn’t want to give up before the miracle happened.
So today Lipstick-Chatters I ask you, are in search of inner peace? Do you believe it will take a complete overhaul of your thinking? What are some of the techniques you currently use to find inner peace? Do you have tips for seeing only the good in someone?
The temptation to quit will be the greatest right before you are about to succeed. I won’t quit if you won’t girlies!
Fee
BTW – I am told this gets much easier with practice and it can actually become your real thinking. I am going to be one helluva a test case!
Posted on February 8, 2013, in Health & Wellness and tagged change, change a thought, Inner peace, thinking, thought. Bookmark the permalink. 13 Comments.
you and me both kiddo, you and me both. But with revised thinking that we have come to use as second nature (what is my part in this?), this does become more “do-able”. Dont quit 5 minutes before the miracle has saved me quite a few times, and lately I need a miracle, a few of them. But with friends like you to share the journey, while at the same time guide me and more often than not blaze the trail. I am sure to find what I seek. Dont goi getting too perfect on me…. love your human-ness as much as your divinity!!!
Haha Mar. Your post reminded me so much of life’s real journey. Sometimes we lead, sometimes we follow. That’s perfect. Since you know better than most, you know you are stuck with my human-ness!! Love you! Thanks for your support girlie!
<3
Thank you fur showing me the true meaning of Namaste.
Namaste Deb.
Kathleen,
When you say: “This is the second time in my life that I am willing to go to any length to get “it”.. I see this a enormous strength and conviction. Look what happened when you made this decision the first time! Look what has happened to all of us who decided to go to any length. Life got better than we ever imagined, we were filled with grace, peace and serenity. We began to abandon our self-absorbed selves and became willing to be of service to others. We accepted life on life’s terms and began an inner journey, a soul-searching mining of the flaws that kept us from becoming the best version of ourselves.
Change your thinking?? yep, will it be easy, probably not, but is anything really worth having easy? We make the effort to change and hope we are given the wisdom to know the difference. Your struggle is my struggle and the struggle of many, as evidenced by the already heart-felt posts here today. So be courageous my friend, and embrace this next chapter with openness. Goodness will surely follow.
I love you, my friend.
Kim
Thank you Kim. Our wonderful conversations that guide me! I Luvya girlie. Your strength is mine
Everything I ever let go had claw marks on it. Not an original thought but since I cannot remember who it should be credited to I will borrow the phrase. I am a change-hater. Over the years I have learned that I never knew what was good for me in the first place which softened my resolve to stand with my feet firmly planted in my own will. Truth be told I have to admit that time and time again I have been shown that “nothing changes if nothing changes.” I believe that I still harbor a sick little desire to test my misery which is directly related to my refusal to change. When I let it go, when I enable myself to withhold judgment and trust the process I ALWAYS benefit. Apparently this lesson keeps surfacing for me as well because I haven’t quite mastered the art of unconditonal faith. I’ll work on my perspective toward change today. Thanks for the project! Love You Nessa
Thanks for your thoughts Vanessa! We are all told early on.. nothing changes if nothing changes. I constantly remind myself of that and press through the fear. Luvya girlie!
Most people need to change their thinking. It is more natural for people to think negative thoughts and it takes conscious effort to think positive thoughts. Negativity will never give us peace, so we need to work hard at replacing any negative thoughts with positive thoughts before they become negative words and actions. I like the term that Joyce Meyer uses – she says that we have ‘Stinking Thinking’ and she is so right. When I have trouble seeing the good in other people, I try to remind myself that I’m certainly not perfect and I have no right judging them when I have just as many faults. It’s hard but with practice, it does get easier.
I love the term stinking thinking as well. Thank you for sharing your insights. We love hearing how others make this work. I’m still practicing
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It’s cognitive behavioral therapy without the shrink! In other words re-training your brain. Somewhere in my files I have worksheets about this! If I can do it, you can do it! The key is to remember the hated and dreaded “Baby steps,” and that no one is perfect, except God. So when you tell your sister to “F#$% OFF it’s just a stumble…keep trying! Truthfully it really does work in the long run. Good Luck!
Great advice. I’m sure it’s Debbie you told to f*ck off not me LOL. It’s progress not perfection. I would love to see the worksheets. Thanks for the tips and encouragement. Love you!!
WOW you got a lot of great advice. I am not sure I could love that person that just cut me off but I think I will try to from now on thanks to you. Just one thing at a time though. Marianne your advice was wonderful and “Baby steps” is how we all need to remember to do. I personally like jumping ahead and sometimes have to remember those baby steps. Love you for sharing and Love Kathleen for writing this blog with Betsy and Warren. PS Love you too Debbie