You want me to change WHAT?
Have you ever been at one of those crossroads in life where you know you need to change, but that thought is paralyzing? You ask the Universe why, oh why, now? Haven’t I grown enough? When I was getting sober, clearly change was necessary. So I innocently asked, “you want me to change what?” I was told “EVERYTHING”. I’m sorry, huh?? You want me to change WHAT? EVERYTHING. It seemed impossible. It wasn’t.
I am here again, but this time it is not my drinking, it’s my thinking. I am at that place where I have to change EVERYTHING. If someone told you that you had to change most everything about your thinking, but in exchange, you would find inner peace, would you do it? Would you even be willing to give it a try? My spiritual quest has brought me to this crossroad. I am told that I can have the deep, inner peace I so desperately desire. In exchange, I have to change EVERYTHING. Damn.
The spiritual teachers lay out a very specific path to this sanctuary. You have to see everyone as divine love, one of God’s children, perceive only their good because their bad doesn’t exist. Yep. That means the guy that cut you off and took your parking space. Divine Love. The woman at work who refuses to lift one finger to help you. One of God’s children. The person who left the dog crap on the sidewalk and walks away pretending it wasn’t their dog crap. Only good. So are you ready to change your thinking? Are you ready to change everything? How do you feel about hard work? I mean really hard work.
This is the second time in my life that I am willing to go to any length to get “it”. So, as soon as the human, I am so far from divine it’s actually scary, thought pops into my head, I consciously repeat the changed thought. The thought that will bring me inner peace. The divine truth that everyone and everything is love. Currently about 1 out of every 5 of my thoughts need re-working. So I am spending much of every day changing my thoughts. Am I mentally exhausted? Absolutely! The question comes back to how bad do you want anything?
I was exhausted during my entire first year of sobriety, but I didn’t want to die. I was worn down at the halfway point of my 3 ½ year weight loss journey, but I didn’t want to stop before I was healthy. At mile 9 of the half marathon I was pretty sure I wasn’t going to make it, at mile 12 it was definite, but I didn’t want to give up. I didn’t want to give up before the miracle happened.
So today Lipstick-Chatters I ask you, are in search of inner peace? Do you believe it will take a complete overhaul of your thinking? What are some of the techniques you currently use to find inner peace? Do you have tips for seeing only the good in someone?
The temptation to quit will be the greatest right before you are about to succeed. I won’t quit if you won’t girlies!
BTW – I am told this gets much easier with practice and it can actually become your real thinking. I am going to be one helluva a test case!