Monthly Archives: November 2012
My little old dog: A heartbeat at my feet. – Edith Wharton
I have been struggling with what to write about today. So many changes are happening in my life. Some fantastic, some could be better; all exactly what they are supposed to be, I guess. Each time I sat down to write, there would be Bailey. In case you don’t know, Bailey is my 5-year-old Chihuahua/terrier dog. Sometimes she wanted to play. Sometimes she wanted to walk. Sometimes she wanted to sleep (that means finding her comfortable position somewhere on me). Sometimes she wanted a treat. Sometimes she wanted to go for a run. But every time, she just wanted to give me love. That’s it.
She was actually a gift from my nephew. Having lived alone for such a long time, he assumed I was lonely, and Bailey would solve that problem for me. A problem I didn’t know I had. He could not have been more right. I didn’t realize how lonely I was, until I got her. The gifts she gives me are so many. I spend the first and last 5 minutes of each day petting her, and as much love as I can squeeze in between. She keeps me in shape by running. She keeps me from isolating because I have to walk her around the neighborhood. She keeps me warm as she sleeps on my legs. She makes me laugh as I get on the floor to do Pilates, she grabs her toy and whacks me in the head with it. She makes me a little crazy, because she is always under my feet (she has terrible separation anxiety ). She has actually comforted me in my grief, pushing her little 12 pound body against my leg literally holding me up as I received the news of a dear friend’s passing. She grabs my heart, when she sits in her chair and just watches me (she’s doing it now).
So when I couldn’t think of what to say today, she sat in my lap and gave me my answer. Stop thinking and just be. Animals have a way of giving without taking, loving no matter what, and living in the moment. I can learn a lot from them. If you have an animal that lives in your heart, please share your stories and your photos. If you think I am crazy for writing this, you can tell me that too. But if any of you knew my father, remember he said that if he had to come back, he would definitely come back as my mother’s dog because it’s a damn good life. So the next time you see Max, maybe just maybe…….:)
After the kitchen’s put back in working order I hit the couch and wonder how all the fabulous working women I know pull this off day after day. Honestly, after 7 years I’m already tired of it. I did okay at being a stay at home mom. It was easier for me to knock out the chores and attend to the emotional well-being of my kids without the added distraction of a career. It seems that until I refine my multitasking skills, I’m going to need one of those telephone booths that Clark Kent is always ducking into or my ships going to sink fast.
Alas, cell phones have rendered the phone booth extinct and I am left to find a more practical solution. And I fear that solution, like most, lies within. All the psychic fingers seem to pointing directly at the word ‘balance’. Finding a way to grab the good at work and leave the things I can’t control inside my classroom when the bell rings. Living in the moment while I’m at home. Letting go of my agenda and enjoying the sight of my daughter twirling around in her new jeans while I’m trying to write this post. Taking the time to go sit on my son’s bed and ask him about his day. Being happy that he has more than a one-word answer. The chores can wait. The post can wait. The lesson plans can wait.
My oldest is having knee surgery in a couple of weeks and I did something completely out of the ordinary for me. I risked the disappointment of my boss and put in for 3 days off so that I can tend to him and be there when the others get home from school. I get to play full-time mom for a few of days and I couldn’t be happier. Then it will be time to go back to work, refreshed and ready to tackle the next academic challenge.
Balanced Rock (Photo credit: RepoMan84)
Maybe someday I will get the hang of this balance thing. Until then, any tips and advice would be handy. Thank you for letting me share!